I know...I know! Before you say anything, I know! I have been absent from the blogging world. Does that mean I have been absent from my Journey of Health? Well, yes...and no. I am not about to flood you with a bunch of excuses. I am just going to explain what happened.
As you might know, I was working two jobs. That's right, past tense. My 2nd job "eliminated the position." I feel like it was handled poorly and it has given me a bad taste for trucking. (Because the 1st 8 years in trucking that beat me down, made me depressed, and killed me emotionally didn't do it!) On top of that, I was helping out my parents with my MeeMaw. I didn't have a spare moment. Could I probably really spare 30 minutes a day to work out? Well, sure. That meant I had to get up early or lose sleep. 30 minutes might not sound like a bit deal. It is when you do not have any free days off work. It has been pretty established that I am not going to get up early to do squat as well!
You would think that meant once the job was no more & I had free days that I came back at it full force? Well, no again. School started back up. (I am not getting up early for anything!) and I just don't have even 30 minutes to spare in the evening. So, what does that mean?
Week 5 I was still working my 2 jobs. I decided that I would take a week off from working out nearly every day. That might be where my mistake came in. I was swimming everyday and I thought that would be enough. I would pick it back up week 6.
Week 6 came & I didn't do a thing. No swimming, and eating terrible. I allowed that door to bad health choices to open back up and I danced right through it.
Week 7 I saw what I was doing and the spiral that was about to happen. I sat down and had a talk with myself. :-) I still didn't want to focus on the weight part of being healthy. That is not a healthy way for me to go with it. I wasn't going to kid myself and say I was getting up early to work out. I didn't see where I could find time to work out after work. What was a girl to do? I pulled my eating back on track. I stopped monitoring my calorie intake. With PCOS, calories (or lack there of) isn't going to help me be healthy. I am focusing on having a more clean diet. I stay aware of how much calories I am putting my body. I am just choosing not to focus on that. With my past, I cannot focus on that. I am eating healthy, clean, and the right portions.
What about working out? Well, I had a bad experience with someone from BeachBody. Not bad per se, but not ideal. I have never learned or excelled by someone yelling, being ugly, or berating me. It is just not how I work. I actually shut down when that crap happens. Some people need a drill sergeant berating them. I need a gentler approach. It completely turned me away from the BB thing. Not to mention that at this time, I don't have 30 minutes of non-work time to go home and work out.
I was talking to my Dad and sister last weekend. They both are part of a gym. UGH. I hate gyms. I am not about dragging my fat rear end to a gym, working out in front of people I don't know and are better at it than me. A girl has to do what a girl has to do though, right? I DO have 30 minutes (to an hour) during lunch and there is a gym right down the street from my work. I usually sit at my desk at lunch. Soooo....why not go work out?! So, that is what I am going to do.
Yes, I lost focus a little bit. I think that happens from time-to-time in a journey to healthier you. The main thing is that I got back on focus! I cannot join the gym just yet. Hopefully at the end of next week i will be able to. In the mean time, I am going to focus on healthy eating options and healthy thought about me! I am my own worse enemy. No one can tear me down and make me feel like dirt better than myself. I am working on changing that!
Wish me luck. I hope not to lose focus again. I hope that this new change will be a good change. I hope for a healthier me!
If you have any suggestions, I am happy to hear them! I am a novice at this kind of thing and I dont shy away from advise. Let me have it!!