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My Healthy Life | How I Deal with the Failures

My Healthy Life | How I Deal with the Failures by march to December You might have noticed (or might not have) that I didn't blog last week. I was around. I just wasn't blogging. I decided to take a week off. I worked on the look of the blog, re-imaging some posts, and a few other things. I didn't get to update how my week of turning my life into a healthy one went....well...it didn't.

Like so many times before, I started and then failed. I hate when I do that. That being said, it is a process. Would I like to flip a switch and never look back at the unhealthy person I was? Of course. There are little, to no one, that can do that. I am absolutely cannot. Clearly; as I have been working on this for years!

That is what I am going to talk about today. On top of updating my goals for the week and the rest of the month, I am going to talk about how I personally deal with the failures that arise in my healthy life.

How I Deal with the Failures

There are many things that cross my mind when I hit a snag in getting healthy or just plain ol' flush it down the toilet.

  • I should just give up.
  • I am never going to accomplish this.
  • I am a failure.
  • This isn't working.
  • I suck!
  • I am so done with feeling like this!
  • Here we go again.
  • Time to start over again!
That is pretty much how my entire though process goes. Usually it just ends up with me feeling sorry for myself, hating on myself, and ripping myself apart. That is a terrible cycle to be in! When I say cycle, I mean it! A constant round-and-round battle with myself. This is usually how I handle these things. Terrible, right?

[tweet-quote via="march2december"]When I say cycle, I mean it! A constant round-and-round battle with myself.[/tweet-quote]
This past week, I let myself get behind in the steps-challenge with my husband and dad. By Tuesday I had given up. There was no way (in my mind) that I was going to come back and win. So stupidly, I gave up. Not only did I give up on the step-challenge, I gave up on everything else too. No working out. No eating healthy. Drinking all the Dr. Peppers. Seriously! With one thought, I failed an entire week. I sabotaged everything that I had done the week before. If not more. 

What Did I Do Differently This Time? 

Well starting out, nothing. I knew in the back of my mind what I was doing. Yesterday it shoved its way to the front of my mind. The never ending beating myself up cycle started. I was apologizing to my husband for being fat. (which he put a stop to immediately). I was feeling sorry for myself. I was calling myself names. I hated everything that I was wearing.

Then something clicked. This wasn't healthy! Yes, I messed up. I am human. We all have those little failures in reaching a goal. Does that mean I failed at the entire goal? No! I can start right back up from where I am at. Not tomorrow. Not the following Monday. Right that moment.

I was lying in bed (because I threw my back out.) thinking. How healthy am I if I am calling myself names? Will I ever accomplish my goal if with every set back, I stop and then beat myself up? No! That isn't healthy and I will never accomplish anything.

The Life Lesson 

The thought popped in my head about my son. He was learning how to dive this past week. He kept trying and he kept failing. He would get so mad at himself, beat himself up and then say he wasn't going to do it anymore. When I asked him why, he said that it was because he kept failing at it. Well...mister...that isn't going to fly! I talked to him about trying and never giving up. I told him that anything worth having is worth working for. I told him that I knew he could do it. He isn't a failure and he shouldn't talk about himself like that. I wouldn't let anyone else say those things about him. I am not going to allow him to either....
::: crickets :::

Yep. I know. I know! As I was telling him these things, I wasn't giving myself that pep talk. I was in the mind set that my son was worth it, but I was not. That just simply isn't true and it sure as heck isn't healthy!

All this was said to say this. It is all a mind over matter thing. It is a day-to-day...no!...a moment-to-moment battle. We are faced with those choices all day. Do I drink the soda or should I just go get a glass of water? It is too hot to go for a walk. I will just sit here in the cool A/C. Each moment is a potential winning moment or a failure. Are we always going to win? No. (If you are...go you!!)

[tweet-quote via="march2december"]It is a day-to-day...no!...a moment-to-moment battle. [/tweet-quote] I am taking each moment as just that. Another opportunity to win. Another small victory. I cannot...will not...let one failed moment sabotage weeks of work. I will talk to myself the way I would talk to my son.

How I deal with failures? Usually very badly! Now, they are only a small moment in a bigger picture. I will not let them define who I am or my goals.

I hope that helps at least one person get back on track and stop with the unhealthy way of thinking. Now on to

My Healthy Life | How I Deal with the Failures by march to December

This Week's Goals

I am not even going to talk about my last goals. See the previous writings above. I am sure you can figure out what happened. I am going to use those goals for this week, as well as a few others.

  1. Give it to God
  2. Be Active
  3. No Soda
  4. Positive Thinking
I found that not only did I give up on being healthy, I didn't read my bible once! I wasn't active. I drank all the soda. I tore myself apart. This week is going to be different! 

If You have any tips, tricks, or suggestions I would love to hear them. That isn't just me saying it for the sake of the blog. I mean it. I cannot do this alone and I am not above getting ideas or even criticism from others. If you have a story on how you got started, link me up! I will not only love reading it, I will post it to my social media accounts. Very few people can live the healthy life without motivation and ideas from others.

My Healthy Life - Getting Started

Happy Friday everyone. I wanted to start something new here on my blog. Well it isn't new really. I have tried this before and failed miserably. I have a new handle on it now though. This new series is all about My Healthy Life. Living my life physically, mentally, and emotionally as healthy as I can. This is not about losing weight. Don't get me wrong. I want to lose weight. I am not making this my focus though.

What is this about? 

My Focus, and how I picked the name for this series, is living a healthy life. My last venture into getting healthy I called it a journey. Although this is a journey, I wanted to make it more of a permanent thing. I am not getting to the destination of healthy. I am healthy now! Each and every choice I make that is healthy is making my life now a healthy one. The destination of this journey is to be more healthy. To be the best version of La'Shawn that I can possibly be.

Like I have said, I have tried to change my lifestyle before. I made it more about the food and more about the losing weight than I did an over-all look at things. If you have been around with me for a year or more, you have been here for my start & fail at this, my un-healthy obsession with food, and my bad self-image problems.

I was doing this for all the wrong reasons. Not only to replace one unhealthy option with another, but to get readers on this blog. This time, this is for me. Only for me. I want to be healthy not only physically, but mentally and spiritually. I want to be able to get out of bed in the morning without having to move around like I am 80. (In fact, I am pretty sure my 80 year old grandmother probably gets around better than I do!). I want to be able to go to bed at night without feeling guilt for what I have or have not done during the day. I want to go to sleep and wake up thanking God and living for him. I want to be able to look in the mirror without not only picking myself image apart but ripping it to shreds!

Getting Started

This is a lot! I know. So, how did I get started? I have started and failed so many times. What made this time different? I have read many blog posts, news articles, and books about people who successfully have started and kept to a healthy lifestyle. Most every single one stated that you have to find something that works for you! What works for one person, might not work for you. You, like me, might have to try so many things to get healthy that you lose track. I have lost track on the number of things I have tried.

What started mine and the thing that I found that worked for me was reading my bible every day. Seriously. I started reading it with my husband and son. We started in Matthew. We use an app/website that breaks down the bible chapter-by-chapter. (I will have another blog post just about that website/app probably next week). God works in amazing ways! I was struggling with food and self image. We hit on a part of the bible that really delves into that.

The 2nd thing that helped me and is more of a physical manifestation of getting started is getting a FitBit. (I will also have a review later this month on the one that I got. check back!) Just getting the FitBit didn't get me moving though. It was only part of the equation. No matter what, I am a lazy person by nature. Just because I have something on my wrist telling me to move, doesn't mean I am going to!
My Healthy Life - Getting Started
Post-Work Out photos (notice the FitBit!)
I am competitive by nature though! My hubby got a FitBit as well. The same day I did. We have competed every week since then on who gets the most steps. I am not going to lie...I've lost every week so far. What I have lost in the challenge though, I have gained in a healthier lifestyle. There has only been a few waking hours the past few weeks that I have not been up and moving. Before this, I would sit all day and not give a care to getting moving until it was time to work out. I will get up and run in place for 300 steps if I haven't done much that hour.

Not only that, it is making me actually work out and look forward to working out. You know what? Working out gives me about 1K steps in 25 minutes. I make sure I get my work out in so that I get those steps. The faster and harder I move the more steps I get.

Finding something that works for me is what got me actually living a more healthy lifestyle. Giving it to God and being competitive was the winning combination for me. When I don't feel like doing it, I pray to God to give me strength and then think of the hubby being ahead of me in steps. Up I get and moving I go!

[tweet-quote via="march2december"]Finding something that works for me is what got me actually living a more healthy lifestyle.[/tweet-quote]


The last post I wrote, 100 Days - 5 Pounds, I laid out some pretty simple goals for me. They were

  1. Give it to God
  2. Be Active
  3. Eat Clean
I have accomplished one and two. I am working on goal three. That being said, I will hopefully be posting every week on how I am doing and what is going on in my Healthy Life. I will post 3 monthly goals though every month. Check back on Monday's for the weekly posts and the 1st Monday of the month for the monthly goals.

July's Goals

  1. No more soft drinks!
  2. 10,000 steps (or work out) 5 days a week
  3. Lose 5lbs 
I know that I said that I wasn't going to focus on weight loss. That it wasn't about that. I do need to lose some weight in order to be healthier. In order to get these 10,000 steps in a day without feeling like I am going to die or unable to walk (seriously) by the end of the day.  

If You have any tips, tricks, or suggestions I would love to hear them. That isn't just me saying it for the sake of the blog. I mean it. I cannot do this alone and I am not above getting ideas or even criticism from others. If you have a story on how you got started, link me up! I will not only love reading it, I will post it to my social media accounts. Very few people can live the healthy life without motivation and ideas from others.

Wordless Wednesday - Summer Fun

Wordless Wednesday - Summer Fun

City of Bones by Cassandra Clare Book Review

City of Bones by Cassandra Clare Book Review by March to December
City of Bones 
by Cassandra Clare
(photo below and synopsis from goodreads)
When fifteen-year-old Clary Fray heads out to the Pandemonium Club in New York City, she hardly expects to witness a murder -- much less a murder committed by three teenagers covered with strange tattoos and brandishing bizarre weapons. Then the body disappears into thin air. It's hard to call the police when the murderers are invisible to everyone else and when there is nothing―not even a smear of blood―to show that a boy has died. Or was he a boy? This is Clary's first meeting with the Shadowhunters, warriors dedicated to ridding the earth of demons. It's also her first encounter with Jace, a Shadowhunter who looks a little like an angel and acts a lot like a jerk. Within twenty-four hours Clary is pulled into Jace's world with a vengeance, when her mother disappears and Clary herself is attacked by a demon. But why would demons be interested in ordinary mundanes like Clary and her mother? And how did Clary suddenly get the Sight? The Shadowhunters would like to know...

Exotic and gritty, exhilarating and utterly gripping, Cassandra Clare's ferociously entertaining fantasy takes readers on a wild ride that they will never want to end. 

Do not read any further if you do not want any spoilers!